Loving a Man Who Forgot Me Novel Chapter 68
Mom squeezed my hand and nodded. “Your sister loves more fiercely and feels more deeply than perhaps anyone I’ve ever known.
It’s both a strength and a weakness. She might be your little sister, but she would take on the world for you Abel, and she doesn’t know what to do when she can’t help the people she loves.”
“I know,” I said. My sister was the strongest, fiercest, and most fragile person I knew.
A juxtaposition that didn’t make sense but was true. She’d take on the world without backing down sure enough, but she’d feel everything while doing it and eventually it would tear her apart and leave her heart in shreds.
She’d sink into depression for a little while, and then she’d heal and put her heart right back out there again. It was hard to watch.
Mom and I moved inside, and while Mom took a seat at the counter, waiting for Dad to get off the phone, I padded down the hall to Addie’s room and knocked.
“Come in,” her soft voice muttered. I pushed the door open and poked my head in. Addie was sitting on the floor, propped up against her bed. She looked up at me dejectedly.
I walked over and dropped down beside her. She lay her head on my shoulder and we sat there like that. Neither of us saying anything for a while. Eventually, she picked her head up off my shoulder and glanced sideways at me. “You going to be okay?”
“Eventually,” I told her. “You?” “Eventually,” she sighed. “I hate her, Abel. I know I shouldn’t, but I do. I never liked her to begin with, and everything she does just makes me despise her more, and now . . . I don’t know how not to hate her for doing this to you.”
Her words hung in the air for a moment and then I said, “I hate her a little bit too. I have for a while, because I’ve felt so trapped. Like I haven’t had a choice in all this, but I did have a choice. I never should have gotten involved with her. I never cared about her the way I should have.
She was a way to pass the time. It was easy because I didn’t care, because I wasn’t invested. I could walk away at any time, but I didn’t. I stayed. I was a selfish asshole and I kept using her.” Addie snorted. “Like she wasn’t using you.
She was practically nobody before you two started dating. She’s always been a greedy little gold digger just trying to climb over people to get to the top.”
“That might be true, but it doesn’t make what I did or how I treated her okay. I don’t know if Katya ended her pregnancy on purpose or not, but talking to Mom made me realize, that even if she did, blaming her and hating her isn’t going to make me feel any better.
If anything, it makes me feel worse. It’s like a black cloud suffocating me and I just don’t want to live like that.”
Addie nodded, but kept her lips pressed together. Her eyes were watery and wouldn’t meet mine. I nudged her shoulder with mine and forced her to look at me. “I don’t want you to hate her. You’re too good of a person for that.”
“No, I’m not,” she muttered begrudgingly. I smiled. “Yes, you are. You’re compassionate and forgiving and full of life. You brighten up people’s lives just by being you.
You’re a little bit crazy, and you might get pissed and blow up every once in a while, but then you move on. You don’t stay bitter and you don’t hold grudges.” “Ugh,” she groaned. “Why can’t you just let me have this? I want to hate her for you.”
“Hate is beneath you, Addie.” She folded her arms and rested them on top of her bent knees. “Now you sound like Mom.” “That’s because I just spent the last half hour with her listening to her wisdom and sage advice.”
“It’s sooo annoying how she wants us to be good people,” she said with a sarcastic eye-roll. I chuckled. “Yeah.” She blew out a weighty breath. “I need to call and cancel my trip to Europe.” “Like hell,” I said. “Abel,” she ground out. “Addie,” I retorted giving her a hard look.
“You’re going. I know what Fashion Week means to you. I know how much you’ve been looking forward to it, and how important it is to your career.” She started to protest but I cut her off. “No, you’re going. And I’m going to get my mess sorted out and be alright.
You’ve got to do your thing. Have fun and wow all the fashion assholes. I’ll feel better knowing my life isn’t ruining yours.” She scowled and smacked me. “You’re not ruining my life.” I rubbed my arm where she’d hit me. “But you know what I mean. Go on the trip.”
“Fine.”
I stood and stuck out my hand to her. She slapped hers into it and let me pull her up. “Is it cool if I hide out here a day or two until I know what I’m going to do?”
“Yeah, my roommate left for London already so there won’t be anyone here.” I pulled her in for a hug and kissed the top of her head. “Thanks.” She squeezed her arms around me and then kicked me out so she could pack.
Mom and Dad were in the kitchen talking when I interrupted. “How bad is it?” I asked, sliding into the tall chair beside Mom’s. Dad gripped the counter and leveled his gaze with mine. “For now they’re telling everyone the show is cancelled due to a family emergency.
I explained the situation. They’re not happy, but they’re trying to be understanding. They want you and the rest of the band there Monday morning for a meeting to discuss moving forward with the rest of the tour.” I guess that was better than straight up being dropped.
They were trying to salvage their cash cow. “Not very smart, them wanting to put me in a room with Gio.” “You need to figure out how to go in there and keep a cool head, Abel,” Dad said more sternly. “Don’t worry, I won’t be the one to lose it.
The label will when I tell them there’s not going to be a tour. I won’t go on the road with Gio.” Dad pushed off the counter. “You could be looking at a major lawsuit if that’s your decision.”